Duncan Garner is a man with a lot of opinions. Throughout his long career as a broadcaster, he’s been a straight-talker and in his current role as the morning talkback host on Today FM, he certainly has plenty to say. But when his mum Sue and son Buster are in the room, he doesn’t get quite so much airtime.
Duncan and Sue are very alike, all go and full of life, and young Buster, it seems, is following in their footsteps. This is a family that has a lot of laughs and fun, and they stay close in good times and bad.
“It’s easy to love these guys,” says Duncan. “Mum’s my rock – she’s so supportive, and she’s always there for me and Buster.”
Duncan’s devoted to his mum Sue and son Buster. “It’s easy to love these guys,” he says.
“You’ve been my rock,” Sue tells him. “I’ve been on my own for 12 years now and that’s been tough. But Duncan’s always there for me. We’re each other’s rocks. I think that’s really important.”
“And I’m a meteor,” adds 12-year-old Buster, cheekily, not letting things stay serious for too long.
The Garners like spending time together. They are a sporting family, and Sue has been a regular on the sidelines cheering on her three children and then her grandkids. Now her youngest grandchild, Buster, plays rugby league and Sue never misses a match if she can help it.
The proud Gran is Buster’s biggest cheerleader.
She is just as proud of Duncan, tuning in to his show every morning. “I love it, it’s a major part of my day,” she says. ‘I’ve learnt how to listen on my phone, so I can take it wherever I go now.”
Like most mums, she worries about him not looking after himself, working too hard or not getting enough exercise. She likes to send him off with home-cooked meals (Duncan reckons there are more of her plates at his place now than in Sue’s apartment), and she is always ready with a listening ear and a few words of advice when they’re needed.
“If there are any issues, I’ll offload and tell her,” Duncan confides. “Sometimes I wonder if I tell her too much.”
The past year or so has been especially challenging with the break-up of Duncan’s marriage to Buster’s mum coinciding with him reaching burn-out with his previous job at Three’s The AM Show (now AM) and making the decision to leave.
With Mark Richardson and Amanda Gillies on The AM Show.
“I won’t lie; that was a tough period going through those changes, but Mum was always there for me,” says Duncan.
There are no regrets about leaving Three’s breakfast show.
“I’d done five years and more than a thousand shows, which means more than a thousand 2.30am alarm calls. I wasn’t depressed, but I was exhausted. Those were brutal hours and it was time to go.”
Unfortunately, his departure coincided with last year’s long Auckland lockdown. Buster happened to be at his mum’s house when it was announced and, with Duncan unable to visit Sue, he found himself unexpectedly alone with nothing to do. For someone who tends to go full bore and likes to be surrounded by people, it was difficult dealing with the empty days and isolation. So Duncan was thrilled to get the call from Today FM and be back at work again.
“That was like a phone call from heaven because I love radio,” he enthuses. “The hours with this job are better, but I’m still up at 5am because I have to be prepared. And I’ll admit the job has tested me. I’m on air for three hours a day and those hours are a blank canvas. I’m really putting myself out there, but I love talking to people and learning things, so I can’t wait to get up each day and start doing it.”
“He’s inquisitive,” adds Sue, 75. “He’s always been a busy, going flat-out, high-energy sort of person. I’m a bit like that myself.”
Duncan confides that at times being busy can be a coping mechanism and it is something that helped him through the grief of losing his father to cancer.
The radio host can’t say enough about the support he gets from Sue. “We’re each other’s rocks.”
“Since Dad died, I’ve tried not to have too much down-time,” he shares. “For the past 12 years, I’ve gone full noise because I don’t want to have to think about things like losing him. If I dwell on it for too long, it’ll be too sad.
“Dad was 62, only 14 years older than I am now. That’s why I spend so much time with Buster. If I die at 62, then I want to be sure that I’ve given everything to him and my other kids, and to life that I possibly can.”
Duncan has four children – two daughters, Te Ahipourewa and Peti-Paerau with journalist Mihingarangi Forbes, who are now grown up and leading busy lives, a son Max from a brief relationship, as well as Buster, his youngest, who lives with Duncan for part of the week.
A lot of verbal sparring goes on between father and son. For instance, when Buster is asked what sort of dad Duncan is, he is quick to reply. “He’s never on time and his phone is always flat.”
But Dad is also very generous, adds Buster more seriously, with his time as well as his money.
“I’m still clinging to my youth, so I love going down to the park with him to kick a ball around,” tells Duncan. “We ride our electric scooters together and we like to go out fishing when we get the chance.”
As for Buster, his dad describes him as loyal and loving. “He’s good at school and on the sports field. He gives his best all the time. He’s polite, respectful and funny. He’s my son, but I also see him as my younger friend and I’m very involved in his life. Soon enough he’ll be off doing his own thing and won’t want to hang out with his dad any more, so I’m making the most of this time.”
He can already see signs his son is becoming more independent. Buster’s learning to cook – he does a good steak and onions, and a fish curry – and he can make his own way home from school these days if necessary. He is also starting to take Duncan on in the career stakes, trying his hand at acting and appearing in a couple of TV commercials. That has led to some funny moments.
“One time we were driving down to Taupoō and stopped at a gas station where there was one of those massive digital billboards. All of a sudden, I saw myself,” explains Buster. “I was like, ‘That’s me, I’m more famous than you Dad!'”
Whether Buster makes acting his future career remains to be seen, but Duncan will encourage him whatever he wants to do. He remembers as a kid being the class clown and getting told by teachers that he talked too much. “They said I’d never make a living by talking, which is quite funny given what I do for a living now.”
As successful as he has been in broadcasting, Duncan considers parenting his most important job. He loves being able to pick up Buster from school, something he missed out on when his daughters were small and he was working every evening. “I’ve picked him up almost every afternoon since he was five and it’s been a privilege.”
Juggling his career with being a solo dad takes up a lot of Duncan’s time and energy. He is still coming to terms with the end of his marriage and he isn’t even thinking about looking for love again, at least not at this point.
“I’d never say never, but my life is full right now. There are only so many hours in the day and I don’t have the time for a relationship. So I’m just taking it easy. It might happen. It’s actually not great being on my own. But I’ve got great mates and the house is often full with Buster and his friends, and I have my family.”
If there’s one thing Duncan would like to find time to do a lot more of it would be mentoring younger people, whether that’s helping coach some kids’ rugby or inspiring a new generation of journalists and broadcasters.
“The world is a tough place, and it’s take-no-prisoners out there and getting harder probably,” he says. “Skills really matter – they mean you have choices. I remember getting inspired by people who came and spoke to us at school, so I’m always first to put my hand up to speak to a class. I’ve had role models in my life and know how much I’ve soaked up and learnt from them. And now I quite enjoy imparting what I know.”
Catch Duncan Garner Today, 9am-midday, weekdays on Today FM.
